Wednesday, November 23, 2011

In Which The Colloquialism For That Most Intimate Of Acts Is Used Quite A Lot

In Which The Colloquialism For That Most Intimate Of Acts Is Used Quite A Lot, To the Point That Even The Staunchest Colloquialers Out There May Take Small Offense And Wonder Whether I Seek To Offend Or Shame, For In Realizing That Sometimes The Shortest Sentence Is The Most Complex Conveyance, Your Humble Servant Has Elected To Quite Simply Say:

Fuck FOX. Fuck CNN. Fuck MSNBC. Unfuck PBS. Fuck malls. Fuck TV. Fuck “War On”. Fuck brutes. Fuck White Houses. Fuck corporate lobbyists. Fuck excess. Fuck celebrity. Fuck US magazine. Fuck People magazine. Fuck fuckity fuck TMZ. Fuck guns. Fuck pricks. Fuck Glade Scents. Fuck monoliths calling themselves “Family Companies.” Fuck Disney’s Fuck-Up-A-Kid Factory. Fuck idiots. Fuck dissemblers. Fuck Appleby’s. Unfuck intelligence. Fuck Pepsi. Fuck Coke. Fuck obesity. Fuck malnutrition. Fuck sponsor massas. Fuck recognition whores. Fuck social media. Unfuck outside. Fuck theft. Fuck religion without contemplation. Fuck collusion. Fuck Popes. Fuck Dons. Fuck moguls. Fuck oppression. Fuck depression. Fuck repression. Unfuck cognition. Fuck cable TV. Fuck NBC. Fuck “As Seen On TV” ‘cause it’s all utter shit.

Take a deep breath now and fuck texting, tweeting and poorly performed fellatio. Fuck the fact that the reason you can’t live in peace is somebody else’s version of peace involves their boot in your face. Fuck Abilify and Lunestra and words that fuck you up. Fuck the profit motive, fuck it till the cows come home.

Wait a minute.

Fuck the inability to be quiet. Fuck Wall Street. Fuck it once more. Fuck the dying of the light. Fuck Top 40 whores.

And lastly fuck those who withhold just enough to force us to beg for more.